Jammy Jam: Election Jams!

Before anyone gets too excited, no, this is not a Springsteen/Kid Rock festival of actual political commentary, but rather a small playlist commemorating which songs best fit which political figures in this election season. Feel free to post agree/disagree, but don’t forget: if you can’t say anything nice…you’re probably already an internet commenter and the point is moot. Jam on!

VEEPS!

 

Paul Ryan

“I’m Too Sexy” by Right Said Fred

While Biden may have thought he had this one on lock, the Sexy anthem of the 90’s goes to Ryan. He’s…too sexy for his shirt, too sexy to explain his tax plan, too sexy to let women choose their own health options. The list goes on. He’s too sexy for a lot of things.

 

Joe Biden

“I Got You Babe” by Sonny and Cher

Biden opened up a firm can of whoop-ass on Ryan at the vice-presidential debate, making up for the President’s…less than stellar first debate. He’s also been a great assist-man in the case of gay marriage, which he first voiced his approval for, which in turn made the President have to “come out” in support himself. A wingman with the skills that pay the bills (you know he uses catchphrases. He has to.)

MODERATORS!

 

Jim Leherer

“What’s Up?” 4 Non Blondes

That poor guy. They just steamrolled over him like a pancake on a freshly paved road. On top of that, it was the worst debate Obama “participated” in. Just ask the screaming husk of Chris Matthews in the after-coverage.

 

Martha Raddatz

“Respect” Aretha Franklin

Female moderators FTW! She demanded respect and got it. Boom.

 

Candy Crowley

“He War” by Cat Power

She may not have meant to be a lightening rod, but once she “live fact-checked” on the “act of terror” point, she became one anyway. Conservatives HATED this, and one candidate even said that his opponent was “prettier than Candy Crowley. His opponent is a dude, and I’m willing to bet that cost him some votes.

 

Bob Schieffer

“Giving Up the Gun” by Vampire Weekend

Almost too easy for the foreign policy debate. Schieffer kept discourse on track and asked provocative questions that made us all think about issues overseas. This was all in spite of each candidate bringing the conversation back around to the economy every five seconds (which I think we can all agree is the actual thesis of this election).

 

THE CANDIDATES!

 

President Obama

“Ain’t No Easy Way” by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

He’s been telling us for years how difficult it was going to be to get out of our economic quagmire, our warS (PLURAL), etc. Obviously none of these things are easy to fix, but has he done enough at this point that it’s worth keeping him in office for four more years? He’s for women’s issues, healthcare, and a better economy, but he’s also kind of war weary from four years of slogging through all of these issues at the same time. November 6th can’t come soon enough.

 

Mitt Romney
“National Anthem” by Lana Del Rey


Money is the Anthem for success, so before we go out, what’s your address?

Patriotic! Family man! Wants America to succeed, like he did! Bigger flag pin!

BONUS!

Bill Clinton

“Hey Ladies” The Beastie Boys

This one speaks for itself.

 

Tagg Romney

“Bitches Ain’t Shit” The Ben Folds version [STILL NSFW]

Yeah. He’s going to take a swing at the President. Get real, America.

Advertisements

Posted on 10/23/2012, in Jammy Jams, Political Birch and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: