Category Archives: Marry Me

Marry Me: Brad from the Fosters Ads

Fun fact: even though Fosters’ tagline is “Australian for Beer”, it’s brewed in the UK. This is also the only place where those ads run. And where I fell in love.

 

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Marry Me: Rob Guida

This week’s Marry Me is a babe with flow for days and is clutch in OT. (I’m starting to sense a pattern in this column…)

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Marry Me: Chris Kreider

Yes, I will be doing this as long as the Rangers keep winning (after they lose, at this point, with the Blackhawks and Penguins gone, I’ll completely lose interest and be back to lax all day). I have never once in my life been so jazzed for hockey playoff season. Not one time. But this? This is magic. The Rangers forcing game 7 even with Chris Neil being an absolute pain (literally…sorry, Boyle) was excellent, as the highlights tell me. I can’t WAIT to get back to the states to see them take it all on an actual TV. Sidenote: please make it that far. It’s only a couple of weeks, guys.

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Marry Me: Zach Palmer

Let’s keep it short, let’s keep it sweet. Hopkins’ #45, being cool, collected, Canadian. 412 and LPG were so right, he just put it to the back of the net like it wasn’t even a thing! Oh, did I just swing that around a defender and a goalie? Yawn. Video below!

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Marry Me: Jon Hamm

Find someone who doesn’t love Jon Hamm. He is Don Draper, the adorable handless doctor from 30 Rock, the most accurate possible portrayal of an evil FWB in Bridesmaids, this list goes on. And just when you think you can’t love him anymore, he goes ahead and says this:

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Marry Me: Tim Desko (UVA-Cuse Edition!)

Even over in England, I was still able to catch some lax action, if only from the liveblogs, Twitter and UVA’s magical stat-tracker. Can you believe ESPN charges for overseas streaming? I know Quint has nothing to do this, but I somehow still blame him. Moving on, incredible game, start to finish. I am beyond excited that UVA won, and certain people can attest to the fact that I almost had a heart attack following the game from my flat’s kitchen. Impressive highlights, and my favorite from UVA was a breakout performance by hometown hero Ryan Benincasa. Casa CRUSHED the faceoffs, and that had such a huge impact on the game. Faceoffs and GBs win games! Basics! Woo!

Another thing that wins games is goals. Obviously. So, even though he didn’t win, the star of the game (who has been on quite the streak recently) was Cuse’s Tim Desko. I am loathe to put a Cuse player here from this of all games, but I’m feeling generous since the Hoos won and because Desko completely deserves it. Holy moly can that guy shoot. One hand, behind the back, between the legs, it doesn’t matter. If he shoots it, the ball is most likely headed to the back of the net.

Not to mention, he is rocking some serious lettuce. Where was that in your roster pic, Desko?!

I digress. Tim Desko, despite the fact that mighty Orange fell to the Cavaliers, you were my MVP in this “great and historic rivalry” game.

Marry Me: John Brugal and Francis Ellis

The entire lax world has seen the video by now, but I’m about to go ahead and take a bold stance on it: I loved it. I really did.

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Marry Me: Chandler Parsons

I was going to let the blog go a little bit this week, citing “culture shock” in England, but then someone called me out when he found out I had managed to find “The Big Bang Theory” on British TV, instead of deciding my next possible life partner. SO! BACK TO BUSINESS!

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Marry Me: Josh Romney

I will not be voting in the Republican primaries, but my vote goes to Josh Romney, the third of the sons Romney.

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Marry Me: Martin Biron

This post is dedicated to goalie of the victorious New York Rangers, Martin Biron, and his Husky-like eyes. Onward!

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